


"He just likes me"

by reason_says



Category: World's Most Hated Crew
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-09-15
Updated: 2007-09-15
Packaged: 2017-10-12 20:03:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/128517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reason_says/pseuds/reason_says
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chris and JStar, with blowjobs and cameras. Yeah, like you need more than that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"He just likes me"

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge, this never happened. I am in no way affiliated with any of the real people referenced herein, and I am making no money from this.
> 
> Notes: Written for [](http://violin_road.livejournal.com/profile)[**violin_road**](http://violin_road.livejournal.com/)'s birthday. And only a month late! (Shut up, it's still the 14th where she is.) I don't really expect it to make sense to anyone else, but feel free to try. :-D

**"He just likes me"**  
 _i still havent kissed a dude. although i have a feeling next month jeffrey star might come close._  
\---Chris Gutierrez, 21/02/07

  
It started at LAX. Of course it did. Do you have any idea how many stories start at LAX? Movies, books, TV shows, so many of them revolve around this one airport. Well, there's a reason for that: it's a weird fucking place. So weird that even a six-foot-tall drag queen, dressed entirely in pink and accompanied by three hot girls and a mexican, wasn't out of place. Which was convenient for us, of course, because that's exactly what the five of us were. Me, Elissa, and Meghan are the girls in question, of course, so the drag queen and the mexican are self-evident.

Or are they? Do you even know who I am? If you don't there's a chance you have no idea who I'm talking about, and in that case, this whole account will be utterly pointless.

My name is Lindsie. My last name isn't important; nor is my 'nickname'. You'd do better to forget the second one, actually, as I won't answer to it even when he uses it. He likes to think he's _funny._ You can guess what I think of that.

Oh, I'm sorry. The 'he' in question is Chris. Come on, you can't tell me you don't know him. He's the one who had that song written about him. Yeah, that one. OK, so now what we've established the characters involved, can we get on with the damn story? Good.

It started, as I said, at LAX. Chris had a reading in LA, but that was really just an excuse to visit his girls (Jeffree included). Chris had warned me that Jeffree was probably going to try to molest him, but I have to say I wasn't expecting it to start before we even got to the luggage carousel. Silly me.

Chris had turned his camera on as soon as we left the main concourse, the better to document the arrival into enemy territory (as he put it, prompting a smack from me), and as soon as Jeffree saw it he started preening. It was an interesting first impression, I'll say that much. Of course, as soon as he got close enough, he grabbed Chris' shoulders and kissed him on the mouth, which unfortunately put a stop to the filming.

"Dammit, J!" Elissa rolled her eyes and hurried after him, with Meghan right behind. "You couldn't at least wait 'til we could get a decent video?"

"No, I couldn't." Jeffree stepped back, blinking innocently at the people staring at us. "He's too adorable to resist."

I laughed, biting my lip. "I think you and me are gonna have a lot in common."

\---

I'm sure I wasn't the only one who noticed Chris carefully keeping me out of shot when he was filming in the car. For my part, I stayed quiet (and let me tell you, that wasn't easy), because he's a little ridiculous with not wanting people to know who I am.

But whatever, his issues are not the point of this anecdote. The _point_ is that Jeffree gave his camera guy oral, but wouldn't let him film it. Obviously, that was a smart move, because that shit would have been on the internet in two seconds, and enough people arbitrarily hate him already. I just don't understand, but people can be stupid if they want to be.

But even that isn't really the point. The _real_ point is what happened after Chris turned off the camera.

"Dude, I just don't understand why he'd think that would be OK in the first place!" Elissa was gesturing somewhat wildly, which was more than slightly nerve-wracking given what I'd heard of her driving, but she seemed to be doing all right.

"Oh, you know." Jeffree rolled his eyes and carefully filed a nail. "I'm this MySpace whore, he figured I was one offline, too." He shook his head. "I mean, _yeah,_ to a certain extent, but that was just dumb."

Meghan spoke up. "Hey, but if you blew Chris, would you let him film that?"

"What?" Chris laughed, but it was that nervous laugh he gets to convince people that he's really as uncreepable as he claims to be. "Man, shut the fuck up, come on."

Jeffree twisted in his seat and looked Chris up and down. "I don't know, it depends. Would he put it on the internet?"

"Fuck no!" I nudged Chris. "He wouldn't want his lurkers to see it!"

"Yeah, even if I were agreeing to this, which I'm not!" Incredulity is not a good look for him.

"Aw, come on!" Sitting on either side of him, Meghan and I made a pretty good stereo system.

Elissa laughed, turning back toward us for a moment and sending us all panicking for our seatbelts. "Yeah, come on, Chris, you know you want to!"

"Jesus christ, no!" He raised his arms as if to protect himself. "What the hell is this?"

"Dude, it's not that big a deal!" Meghan rolled her eyes. "You said you'd never post it, so what's the problem?"

"There's no problem, except that I don't want it to happen. I don't know, is that a problem?"

"Jeez, you pussy. What about just kissing?"

"Aargh!"

\---

The five of us went out to dinner that night, and everyone carefully avoided mentioning It. Of course, not mentioning something isn't the same as not thinking about it, and the way Jeffree smirked every time he so much as glanced at Chris said more than words would have.

Finally, we went back to Elissa's apartment. She was going to take us to the hotel, but we hung out for a while first. Chris didn't talk much, which you can probably figure isn't normal, for him. Everyone else was... not so much 'making conversation' as 'rambling on about anything and everything', but it was enough to be interrupted when he suddenly threw his hands up.

"Goddammit, fine!"

Meghan and Elissa whooped, as Jeffree beamed. Chris rolled his eyes and pointed. "Two conditions, all right?"

Jeffree smirked. "Whatever you want."

"Not tonight. You give me a night to change my mind first, or it's not fair."

"Of course. What else?"

"Take those _fucking_ nails off."

Jeffree looked like Chris had asked him to chop off one of his hands. "No! No, I'm not doing that, I don't care. It's not that important." He waved a hand dismissively, but I could tell he wasn't happy about it.

Chris leaned back and crossed his arms. "Fine, that works too. Lin, you wanna get back to the hotel?" I narrowed my eyes at him, but the corner of his mouth twitched and I barely managed to keep myself from laughing.

"Yeah, I'm getting kinda tired. Jet lag, you know."

Jeffree scowled. "Oh, shut up. You do not have jet lag for a two-hour time difference."

We stood up, and I leaned against Chris. "Maybe I'll just blow him, then." I wiggled my fingers. "No nails to worry about."

Elissa was watching us with the expression of someone who wasn't sure which side to root for, but she stood up. "Yeah, c'mon, I'll drive you. J, you wanna come?"

I don't know if she caught the double meaning, but Jeffree certainly did. He held a hand up, inspected one nail mournfully (or maybe casually, it's hard to tell when he doesn't make expressions), and growled. "God, fuck you. Fine. Tomorrow?"

Chris' eyes widened slightly, like he wasn't sure what he'd gotten himself into, but he nodded. "Tomorrow. Before the reading, so I'm not dreading it all day."

Jeffree smiled. "Oh, whatever, you know you'll be looking forward to it."

\---

What happened in the hotel room is really none of your business, is it? Let's just say Chris must have been a lot more worked up than he'd ever admit, even to me.

\--

When we got to Elissa's apartment the next afternoon, Jeffree was sitting at the kitchen table staring at his hands, which had, for possibly the first time in his life, certainly the first time in years, normal-length nails. It was definitely a strange sight. He looked up when we walked in. "Did you bring your camera?"

Chris must have looked like he was thinking of backing out, because Jeffree was on his feet and in front of him in an instant. "The correct answer is 'yes, I brought my camera, because I'm going through with this for the sake of Jeffree's nails if nothing else.' Is that what you were going to say?"

Chris glanced over at me, but he was on his own on this one. "Yeah, that's what I meant." He took the camera out of his pocket, probably in case Jeffree decided to kill him anyway. I took it and made sure it was ready to be turned on.

Meghan came out of Elissa's bedroom, yawning and barely dressed, but she brightened when she saw us. "All right! You're not backing out?"

I rolled my eyes. "Fuck no he's not backing out, I made sure of that."

"Yeah, yeah." Chris shook his head and dropped my hand. "How are we doing this?"

Elissa ambled out of her room, no more dressed or awake than Meghan. "First, you're kissing him."

"What?" Chris laughed, that same nervous laugh. "Or how about no."

Elissa rolled her eyes. "If you're doing this-"

"-Which you _are,_ " Jeffree and I interrupted almost in unison.

"-you're doing it right. Come on, asshole, it's not like you've never kissed a guy before."

"Um, no, it's exactly like that. What the-"

"Wentz counts."

"Whatever, Pete does not count."

" _Pete counts._ "

"No, he totally doesn't! Look, fine, one guy, once, that doesn't-"

"Hah!" Meghan's eyes shone with the effort of not laughing properly. "Once, yeah, that's what everyone says."

Chris rolled his eyes. "Look, can this not be the issue? The point is, no."

"The point _is,_ yes, actually, or none of this counts!"

He shook his head. "No, that's not happening. One blowjob and nothing else, it's bad enough it's getting--"

He was probably about to say "filmed", but Jeffree leaned down and pressed his lips to Chris' harshly. I quickly turned the camera on and moved to get a better picture, but it was pointless. Chris didn't kiss back at all, just stood there for a second before stepping back.

"OK, that's over with, let's get the rest of it done."

Jeffree glanced at the ceiling. "Give me strength." He shook his head. "Fine, over here." He pointed Chris toward the out-of-place armchair, and Chris sat down, reaching for his zipper before pausing.

"Do they have to be here?"

Jeffree glanced over. "What, Meghan and E? Yeah, they _live_ here."

"Shut up, you know what I mean. Can't they not be in the room?"

"No, like hell I'm missing this!" Elissa laughed. Meghan, on the other hand, glanced back toward the bedroom.

"You know, it'll be on tape anyway, we can watch it later."

"Yeah, but-" Elissa saw the look on Meghan's face and gave in. "Fine, later. Lindsie, you better make sure the picture comes out!" The last was rushed as she was almost dragged back.

"And shut your damn door!" Jeffree called after them. "I don't need you fucking with my rhythm."

The door slammed shut.

Jeffree glanced at me, but I waved my hand at him. "Don't mind me, I'll just be over here filming the incriminating video."

"Can ya not put it like that? This is bad en-oh, OK." Jeffree, tired of waiting for Chris to get a move on, had undone his jeans and pulled them and his underwear down in one move. Not bad, for a twenty-one-year-old.

Then Chris and I didn't move much while Jeffree went to work. I found the best angle I was gonna get, and crouched there, zooming occasionally but mostly just watching my boyfriend being blown by a drag queen I'd met the day before. My life was definitely weird before Chris, but it's weird in better ways now.

I could tell Chris was trying to be quiet, but he's not good at that even during bad sex, and Jeffree was damn good. Trust me, I've given enough blowjobs to know when someone else is doing a good job.

After Chris came, with a badly muffled shout, Jeffree spit into one of the mugs on the coffee table and stood up, leaning over Chris and kissing him before he knew what was going on. I quickly stood up too, zooming in as Chris kissed back for a few seconds, hazily, before opening his eyes and jerking his head back.

I lowered the camera, but left it on just in case. Apparently, "just in case" meant, in that case, "just in case the walls are really fucking thin and there are two women having sex in the next room." Chris, Jeffree, and I burst out laughing.

\---

Chris thinks he erased the video, but he's not the only one who has secret accounts and knows how to upload. Yeah, it's out there. You'll never find it, but feel free to try. I'm slowly but surely convincing him he's not as straight as he thinks he is, and it's not just Pete. That video hitting the internet would do wonders to convince everyone else, too.


End file.
